Matthew 14: 22-33
22 Immediately Jesus made the disciples get into the boat and go on ahead of him to the other side, while he dismissed the crowd. 23 After he had dismissed them, he went up on a mountainside by himself to pray. Later that night, he was there alone, 24 and the boat was already a considerable distance from land, buffeted by the waves because the wind was against it.
25 Shortly before dawn Jesus went out to them, walking on the lake. 26 When the disciples saw him walking on the lake, they were terrified. “It’s a ghost,” they said, and cried out in fear.
27 But Jesus immediately said to them: “Take courage! It is I. Don’t be afraid.”
28 “Lord, if it’s you,” Peter replied, “tell me to come to you on the water.”
29 “Come,” he said.
Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. 30 But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, “Lord, save me!”
31 Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. “You of little faith,” he said, “why did you doubt?”
32 And when they climbed into the boat, the wind died down. 33 Then those who were in the boat
worshiped him, saying, “Truly you are the Son of God.”
As many of you know I don't believe in God, his son, miracles, or ghosts so this story loses all power from when I was a child and believed it to be a true historical account. Plus it loses all power when I've seen a man walk on the moon in my lifetime (at least on TV). As mentioned before one of the funnest thing in the world to do is to try to scientifically understand what is going on with all these miracles in the Bible. The all-powerful, all-knowing Mind behind the cosmos who actually created the law of surface tension would obviously be using this law of nature when himself/his son walked on water as told in this story.
Oh, just to clarify, for those believers that could be reading this right now (doubtfully but hopefully) if you are thinking - God is the author of the natural world thus he can on the spot change, bend, recreate laws of natural at his will during these miracles... to this I would offer a few more thoughts: if there was a scientist at the time that could physically study the mechanics of "what was going on" when Jesus walked on water then THAT would be a new constructable framework for a scientific understanding of what is happening in nature at that moment. So, I will let you use the "God is the author of all nature thus does with it what he wills" idea you may be clinging too - but I get to call it what it actually is - MAGIC. If you are an adult reading this and use that idea - you believe in magic. OK. you better own that shit. Now, don't you shy away from "magic-talk" because it sounds childish!
I have another hypothesis. I haven't explored to see if anyone has ever written about this, nor have I even really thought this through before spewing out this silly blog, but who's to say Jesus didn't become the original Ant Man when he walked on water? Nice try Paul Rudd, you are too late! God/Jesus is all powerful after all, could he not have shrunk down to the size of a water-walking bug (or sometimes called "water striders")? Once down to this size he could have easily walked on water with ease using natural surface tension of water laws. This would be a greater miracle than just walking on water wouldn't it?- (since no skeptic was there to verify if he really didn't have something just below the surface. Remember and repeat often a good rule of thumb: Extraordinary claims = Extraordinary evidence.)
Ah, you might come back at my crazy hypothesis - No Magog, the disciples saw him walking on water from very far away! However, let me get my Christian apologetics chops wet here! Look, in the account of the miracle in Matthew it's simply just saying that the disciples saw him .. nothing about seeing him from far away. They don't mention his tiny size and how many things does the Bible leave out that would be rather important or helpful for us to know in 2015! So much, right? They think it's a ghost in Matthews account. I guess technically they were right, but more accurately put it was a Father/Son/HolyGHOST walking on water that night! But who says ghosts can't be the size of small water spiders?! We have yet to construct a working scientific theoretical framework for ghostology yet. OK you might say - what about Jesus reaching out his hand to catch Peter?! Well, clearly this is the time in which Jesus turns to normal size. Duh.
Maybe this is a stretch, but if a donkey and snake can talk a full sized man can live inside of a whale for a few days and survive I think it's a pretty valid hypothesis. Who wants to join me in my quest to understand the tiny ghost/father-god-lamb-son-Mind? Any takers? Also, remember according to these accounts what do we see is the lesson - never DOUBT! Skepticism is the enemy of all constructed philosophies or religions without evidence to support them. Let that shit go.
Marvel's Ant Man Trailer:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pWdKf3MneyI
Water Strider Bugs:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gerridae
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